Two Heads
A Marriage
God established marriage by uniting a man and a woman. The Bible says, "The LORD God also said, 'It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make for him a suitable helper.'" (Genesis 2:18). The Bible also states that it is God Himself who builds the family: "Unless the LORD builds the house, its builders labor in vain" (Psalm 127:1). Therefore, only when God builds the marriage can it be successful. Yet humans seize God's place and build their families according to their own preferences. Thus marriages no longer follow God's will but rather men's own desires. Some husbands rule over their wives and oppress them. The wives become like servants and live in fear, doing things only to satisfy the husband's or father's wishes. Such a marriage is not a healthy, happy family, nor one that reflects God's glory. In some homes, the wife or mother seizes control, and the husband and children merely obey her will. Such a family too is not God's will.
Paul wrote that the husband is the head of the marriage as follows: "But I want you to understand that the head of every man is Christ, and the head of the woman is man, and the head of Christ is God." (1 Corinthians 11:3). Again, "Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, His body, of which He is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything." (Ephesians 5:22-23). Therefore, the husband must lead the family. But if the husband cannot lead, then the wife may give advice, and everything should be decided together by mutual agreement.
As husbands are called the head of the family, they must love their families, provide for them, and nurture them. Being the head does not give a man license to dominate his wife and children. Though the head leads the body and sits at the top, it never oppresses the rest of the body. If a foot hurts, the head also feels the pain and takes care to heal it—does it not? Moreover, does not the Bible say that "the head of the man is Christ"? A husband still must listen to Christ's words. Because Christ is the head, He never oppresses either the man or the church; instead He acts with love and tender compassion. Therefore husbands should care for and nurture their families with tenderness. Many husbands fail to understand their wives' feelings. Household work may not earn money and, though not difficult, must be done every day, so it becomes tiring. Especially childcare is not easy, because it is a full-time job. Because children suffer and worry you, you must show them constant tender care. Is it not better to pay good wages to hire someone to care for the children? Therefore, let each family acknowledge Christ's lordship, and let the father lead his family according to Christ's will, so that wives and children submit, and thus build a successful marriage.
The Church
Year after year, many churches catch a cold in January. This means that because elections are held in the church, some who are dissatisfied become upset, discouraged, and angry, and they dwell on it for a while—often lasting two or three months. Only 20% of elected leaders really work hard, while the rest content themselves with merely being listed as names or appearing in group photos. While this cycle repeats year after year, there is no progress or improvement. Some church leaders fail to grasp their own situation. With no trace of shame, they freely discuss whatever they wish—never donating or tithing, yet suggesting lavish spending of the church's funds.
In truth, the church belongs to Christ, and its head is Christ Himself. Paul wrote that Christ is the head of the church as follows: "He is before all things, and in Him all things hold together. And He is the head of the body, the church; " (Colossians 1:17-18). "Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, His body, of which He is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything." (Ephesians 5:22-24).
If Christ is the head of the church, then it must follow Christ's will. Yet most churches do not pay any attention to Christ's will at all; they merely do as they please, and Christ finds no place within the church. Such churches care only about success in this world, unity among members, and helping them with worldly needs—much more than about members going to heaven.
So it comes down to this: is your church like such a church? A crowd-pleasing church may appear successful in the present age, but it brings no good for eternity. No one should stay in such a church.
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